Hidden in a secret vault beneath Whitehall there is an antique piece of porcelain. It doesn't often see the light of day. It is taken out only as a last resort. But David Cameron has given instructions for it to be brought up. It is the kitchen sink, and we are about to see the British State dust it off and throw it into the Scottish Independence debate.
There are two taps on it, one labelled "threats" and one labelled "promises". We will see both thrown fully open in the next few days and all manner of stuff will come flooding out. Commentators in the media will gasp in awe at the marvellous effusions, and will do their best to persuade us to accept it.
But in the final analysis they won't be able to fool us. We will find we are compelled to turn our noses up at it, because the plumbing for this kitchen sink connects its taps not to a supply of clear, clean water, but directly to the sewers of Westminster.
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